“It smells like college kids in here.”

Last night I decided to give the creative piece of my brain a rest (which never actually turns into being a rest, since I can rarely ever turn it off altogether), and Joe and I headed to a local bar for some trivia and a few Winter Lagers (yum). The place sits on a corner, lit up by neon signs, beckoning all of the local college kids to come out for a drink instead of doing homework, which of course, most of them do.

As soon as Joe and I walk in we are surrounded by sororities and boys in Aeropostale t-shirts, and begin the search for two seats. As I’m scanning the crowded bar, Joe looks around and leans into me. “It smells like college kids in here.” Of course I laughed and called him a weirdo, but then I reminded myself that I once compared a perfume to the specific scent of a Barbie doll. That’s where my laughter abruptly ended.

But, as I racked my tired mind for an interesting topic today, his weirdo statement floated to the front of my memory. I graduated just this past May, and asked if I had an aroma that followed me around, that somehow faded as soon as I put on my cap and gown.

“Nah,” he said. “And you can only smell it when they’re in large groups, anyway.”

Oh, of course!

I thought the place smelled of Grand Marnier and quesadillas. As it should.

But I suppose college kids do have a certain scent to them. Not one that I detected last night, but still. So what is their scent? They spend a lot of time in libraries, so there must be a musty, dictionary, leather-bound essence. All of that on-campus drinking could cause a malty aroma. The late-night snacking might leave a lingering bouquet of cheese puffs. And surely the lack of showering from the young men throws in a hint of B.O.

So there you have it. We could bottle it and advertise it as a unisex scent, marketing to dropouts who want to smell like a Bachelor’s Degree without the loan payments, or to older men trying to attract the young ladies with that authentic college fragrance.

I think my college aroma was freshly copied paper (while it’s still warm) and hot sauce. I ate a lot of Salad Works between classes.

Something to ponder. What do you think?

Happy Wednesday! Heading to the grandfather’s house tonight for a delicious Italian meal (cooked by my Irish/Polish mother). Let’s see what the Italian side of the family has to say about it. Yum!





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9 responses to ““It smells like college kids in here.”

  1. My college scent would have been a mixture of white mocha (I had one almost every morning from the coffee shop on campus), the smell of wet sweatshirts and jeans (from the frequent long walks in the rain from the parking lot to the buildings), and second-hand textbooks (since I’m too cheap to buy new ones).

    • Thank you for the comment, Amy! Mmm, mocha. I didn’t even mention the amount of chai tea I consumed, since there was a Starbucks on campus. And I too had plenty of walks in the rain (and never seemed to have an umbrella). And, when I could, I bought my books on Amazon or in the store, always used. They do have a pretty distinct smell, don’t they?

      • They certainly do! I’ve never tried chai tea. The only coffee house tea that I’ve tried was really gross. I don’t remember what it was, but it had frothy cream on top, and it was GREEN!

      • Chai! My favorite, from the first time I mistakenly pronounced it “kai”, to the joys of solo chai, to soy chai lattes, to homemade chai with cream and honey and black pepper…. anyway, the scent of college students is called “Eau du Last Night”.

      • Hahahahahahaaha. “Kai.” That reminds me of the years I spent pronouncing “iron” as “eye-ren”. But I’m sure your mispronunciation was a one time deal. Mine, sadly, was not.

        That’s it. We are totally starting an ad campaign under that name.

  2. the scent of “college kids” – brilliant. we (notice i say we, i’m cutting myself in for a piece here) could – just off the top of my head – call it:
    Dorm and the ad slogan could maybe be;
    “Smell Smart” (of course our target demographic are morons)
    witty post, as usual NM. continue…

  3. i had a friend who was head copy for a big ad agency, we’d all get stoned and invent ad campaigns…my faves were a new aftershave for men: Bastard! “…because there’s one in every women’s life”…and: a women’s scent called: BITCH! “…be one” continue…

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