Tag Archives: crap

Sh!t!

You guys, I really had to sacrifice a piece of myself for this post.

Seriously. I lost like, a quarter of my brain cells, and definitely a bit of my hearing after all the bleeding my ears did. Did you say something?

And I’m not even referring to this gem featuring the so-very-talented Miley Cyrus. (It’s like a car crash. I don’t even know how I find these things/why I watch them.) I’m not even talkin’ about the creative genius that is Sir Kanye West for his (and Kim’s) performance in Bound 2. (This version is better by the way.) Although they all inspired this post.

I’m talking about the noise I heard on local radio station Q102 as I drove home from work a few days ago. I rarely listen to this station, but once in a while I do enjoy something on the pop side of things, to get me dancin’ while I’m drivin’. Q102 plays pop, rap/r&b, and the occasional hipster song. When the “song” started and someone started to yell “AY” repeatedly to the beat of a bell tolling, I was immediately captivated. It was like the heavens had opened before me, and all of the angels were singing on high. I think I had like three epiphanies. It all made sense…you know….life.

In reality I furrowed my brow and stared at my radio, thinking of ways to set it on fire or smash it to bits. Yet my hand didn’t lift itself to the dial and simply change the station. It couldn’t. I couldn’t. I had to listen until the end, frozen, a prisoner in my own body. I’m not even sure how I found my way home; my mind had gone blank for those few minutes, and when the torture ended I was never the same again. I was particularly amazed at how the smut had made it to the radio, since half of it had to be bleeped out due to inappropriate words.

Driving home from my j-o-b, I listened to someone yell “AY AY AY” and “pimps up, pimps up, hoes down, hoes down”, as I wondered whether or not I could afford all of the presents I have to buy this year….while this dude is probably driving a Mercedes. Blegh. I’m seriously considering getting my ass in a recording studio, drinking three bottles of wine and yelling profanities into a microphone. Think I’d sell an album?

Not that I want to give this crap more publicity, but what would this post be without the source of it all? I apologize in advance.

At least the title calls it like it sees it. This certainly is sh!t!

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